Yet organist Roger Martin held all three high in front of the altar at Holy Trinity Church in Cuckfield when 300 school children heard about the building's importance in today's world.

The youngsters were the new Year 7 intake at Warden Park, the largest secondary school in Mid Sussex, based less than a mile away.

The 11 and 12 year olds heard the rector, the Revd Nick Wetherall, describe the 900-year history of the building.

Around the time of the Civil War he said there were no pews and the church was a place of commerce with even horses, pigs and ducks bought and sold.

Hearsay has it that a crack in the font was caused by a well-aimed kick from a horse belonging to one of Cromwell's cavalrymen.

Mr Wetherall also recalled the days when world war two airmen use the church's spire to guide their planes home after missions over German and France, although in 1980 a cigarette butt discarded by a bird burnt it down.

He said: "We are not fuddy-duddies here, we are ordinary people who want to keep the church alive here in Cuckfield."